Reliance in our Religion

I'm tempted sometimes to envy the church-goer who seems to have it all together.  Such a person's life seems to have clear direction and meaning derived from their church and approved of by the Christians around them.  Maybe they are a missionary or a Sunday school teacher.  Regardless, they've got that all figured out and their life is on track for that goal, that ministry, that work that both God and man will approve of.  When temptations or distractions come their way, they seem immune.  Through sheer force of will, they push through and accomplish their goals, without even messing up their hair in the process.

Such a persona, of course, is a myth.  There are no doubt people who try to live that myth, who pretend to be unshakable and always act like they always know exactly what they're doing.  Underneath the mask, these people are human, too.  Still, it remains an ideal to attain to: to find or borrow some kind of inner direction to unerringly steer us through life, and the strength with which to resist temptation and never deviate from our course.

But is this really an ideal we should be drawn to?  In the end, who does this system rely on?  It may give lip-service to reliance on God, but in the end it is our ability to parse out His will that guides us, and our ability to grit our teeth and try harder in spiritual life that gets us through.  This makes me leery.  I have found that any system that, at bottom, relies on man is doomed to fail, no matter how much lip service it may give to God.

The Bible seems to agree.  On the subject of guidance, Isaiah 50:10-11 praises the faith of those who, when they "walk in darkness" and have "no light" choose to "trust in the name of the LORD and rely on...God."  They place their trust and reliance on Him, His name, His character, who He is, and trust Him to guide them rather than trying to illuminate everything and figure it all out by themselves.  They may remain in the dark, but even there God can guide them.  By contrast, the passage rebukes those who take the matter of guidance into their own hands "who kindle a fire and equip yourselves with flaming torches."  To such as have made their own sense of things and come up with their own plan to guide them, God says, "Walk by the light of your fire, and the torches you have kindled!  This you have from my hand: you shall lie down in torment."  He gives them up to their own devices and plans, but they do not end well without Him!  I don't know about you, but I would rather lead a "dark," seemingly aimless life with God than try to figure it all out and "lie down in torment" without Him.

It doesn't stop at guidance.  So often in the day-to-day battles against temptation we seem to be relying on our own strength.  At so many Bible studies where the topic of temptation and habitual sin comes up, the answer people give seems couched in terms of human effort.  Try harder.  Pray harder.  Read your Bible more.  Resist temptation.  Avoid the source of it.  Memorize these verses.  Read these books.  Pray for God to bolster your own strength so that you can try harder and do it all again.  I don't believe I have ever seen or heard of such an approach working, though I'm sure many people think it works because they have traded one sin for another (lust for pride, maybe) and I'm sure many others (myself among them, I confess) have pretended that it worked and announced ourselves as cured by our own efforts so that we can escape the constant badgering to perform beyond our capabilities.  I'm sure someone will say that it is not our capabilities that matter but God's, and that His power in us is what will make these effort-based techniques work.  But it is not so.  God is not the one trying to memorize Bible verses in the vain hope that being able to recite scripture chapter and verse will make you immune to temptation.  God is not the one installing monitoring software on your computer or outright smashing it to bits (a la Fireproof) in hopes of breaking your porn addiction.  God is not the one putting pennies in the swears jar every time you cuss.  You are, and if you are doing these things of your own effort, then it comes down to a human feat no matter how much lip service we may give to God.

The Bible addresses this too.  The Apostle Paul, frustrated and concerned by a Galatian church that had turned from faith to human effort challenges them.  "Let me ask you only this," he says, "Did you receive the Spirit by works of the law or by the hearing of faith?  Are you so foolish?  Having begun in the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh?" (Galatians 3:2-3).  I confess that many times, I am that foolish.  I know that salvation is something God accomplished for me, the death and resurrection of Jesus bringing me from death to life, through the work of the Spirit within me.  Having acknowledged this, I put it firmly in the past and determine to grit my teeth and pull of a successful spiritual life (which I myself define) through my own efforts.  If I acknowledge God's present involvement at all, it is with the expectation that He will allow me to try even harder and redouble my efforts.  But this is all wrong.  It is the work of the Spirit that perfects us, and His is a work that starts on the inside and works its way out (rather than vice versa, with our efforts).  He starts by removing our heart of stone and giving us a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 11:19 and 36:26), by replacing the lies that made us slaves to sin with the truth that set us free (John 8:32) so that we may have life to the full (John 10:10).  A book I've been reading, Pursued by Jud Wilhite (in a commentary on Hosea 2:16-17), puts it in a different way:

"In fact, the love of God is so powerful it sweeps us off our feet and makes us forget all about those counterfeit loves we pursued.  God says He's going to erase the worship of false gods from the people's midst.  God wants to fulfill the emptiness inside us with a love that will cause all our idols to fall by the wayside.  This is why I believe that conquering our idols and habitual sins is ultimately a matter of being swept up by His love rather than gritting our teeth and trying harder.  If we give Him a chance, God allures us and woos us with loyal love by showing His enormous strength, patience, and gentleness."

This is something I've been sensing about Him for a long time, but never before knew how to put into words.  That God doesn't conquer the sin in my life the way I've been trying to do it, through efforts to avoid temptation, pound myself into obedience, and punish myself for failure, but through captivating me with love.  He doesn't overwhelm me with the consequences of my sin, because He took care of that on the cross (and to wallow further in guilt is to account His sacrifice as nothing).  He doesn't send me to memorize whole books of the Bible, because Satan himself knows the Bible better than we do (and it's not doing him a whole lot of good).  He does not have me smash my computer or move into a cave to live like a hermit, because even hermits can be tempted.  Instead, He transforms my heart and awakens a vibrant desire that loves as He loves.  When temptation comes, it has no power.  It is like a thief with glass beads trying to bribe a jeweler who has seen real diamonds.  When obedience is called for, it flows naturally from a heart that wants to obey.  It isn't a transformation that can even be attempted by my own efforts.  It is totally a work of the Spirit.  And while it does not come with handy human signposts and "torches" to let me know I am on track to some known end goal, it is the only place where I have seen victory, healing, and growth occur.  I would rather have such reliance on God in the darkness than work by my own effort in my own light.